Do you know who you are?

Do you know who you are?
Written by Niloufar Abedi,

Author of Highway to Success and Better living in USA

What type of characteristics describe you best? Introvert, Extrovert, Serious, whimsical, Considerate or Self- centered?

The individual characteristics that identify your unique personality consists of instinctive responsiveness and spontaneous self- assertiveness. This characteristics are mixed in with and modified by the ways you have learned to act and react. From your early childhood, you have observed the actions and attitudes of your role- models (parents, siblings, family, teachers) toward different situations in your environment and cultivated your own unique personality according to your assessment and interpretation of their behaviors in relation to your own needs and drives.

These interactions have eventually formed into definite behavior that defines your personal characteristics. These characteristics explain your interaction with your society (the outer-world observer), your attitude toward yourself and your dreams (the inner-world caretaker), and the way you balance the demands and needs of these two (The negotiator).

A balance between these three parts of your character (the outer- world observer, the inner-world caretaker, and the negotiator) creates an unbeatable inner team that will give you a competent personality. This competency includes self-understanding, self-respect and self- efficiency. With this type of character, you will have the ability and the drive to be creative and positive in your life, to endure and survive any hardship, and to demand success on your own terms. Here is a short review for these three categories.

The outer-world observer in you is responsible for making you an active and accepted participant in your society. As you grow up, most of your training is usually geared toward learning how to fit in your society. You learn to understand and evaluate the needs and demands of your culture. You also learn to provide or satisfy those needs and demands. If you don't, the society you live in will simply discard you. Therefore, you start and continue your adult life with major concentration on your acceptance, recognition and relationship with others. Your social success is usually set by your achievements and accomplishments in your society. Hence, the observer usually takes most of your attention.

The inner-world caretaker's job is to help you understand what your personal dreams are and encourage you to turn them into achievable goals. You have to pay particular attention to the inner-world caretaker because the outer-world observer has a way of demanding your attention and forcing the inner-world caretaker to take the second priority. Therefore, the caretaker is constantly struggling to keep your dreams alive and hopefully bringing them to your attention.

The negotiator is responsible for creating a sense of order and balance between the outer-world observer and the inner-world caretaker. If the priorities and destination of both the observer and the caretaker are the same, then the negotiator will prioritize the needed actions that must be taken as you face different challenges in your life. If the observer and the caretaker do not have a harmonious destination, then the negotiator has to constantly justify the demand of the observer to the caretaker and the needs of the caretaker to the observer. At the same time, the negotiator must decide on the priorities of what must be done and negotiate the time and effort either the observer or the caretaker must have.

You must take the responsibility of creating a situation that will give you the chance to meet with the demands of your society as you fulfill your own dreams. Then you will have a single destination to focus on. The signal for this situation is the jubilant and exhilaration you feel in your daily life. If you are not receiving this signal, your outer-world observer and your inner-world caretaker do not have a harmonious destination. Therefore, you have a feeling of agitation and fatigue. These feeling will take considerable amount of your time and energy which you have to compensate for by reducing the attention and consideration you would have given to your inner-world caretaker. Then you will naturally put your dreams on hold for a later date.

As you grow older, you become more established in your society and develop a lifestyle that absorbs your total attention. However, this is also the time when you become aware of your mortality and deeply sense the meaning of passing time. You finally have the urge to pay attention to your inner-world caretaker and fulfill all of those dreams and needs that so far you have had to put on hold. You start realizing that the "later date" is now. You either start paying attention to your inner-world caretaker and give in to the urge of fulfilling your dreams. An action that is usually known as "midlife crisis", and very often will put the outer-world observer in a secondary position. A place that your society will have difficulty to accept. Else, you will once again suppress the voice of your inner-world caretaker. An action that will develop various self-righteous characteristics in you in response to your inner-world dissatisfaction.

As an adult you have the ability of analyzing and reforming any of your characteristics that is preventing you from reaching your goals. To start this reformation you have to take several steps. First: clearly understand what your goals are. Second: study and analyze the actions you take and the reactions you have toward other people and different circumstances. This understanding will help you discover your strengths and your weaknesses and allow you to plan your actions in a way that you can capitalize on your strengths and avoid your weaknesses. At the same time, your awareness of your weaknesses will give you the opportunity to work toward eliminating them. Third: evaluate your personality and eliminate any behavior that could turn you into a procrastinator.

I have explained these three steps in this and two previous articles titled: (the role of LUCK in your success, and Is your personality helping or hindering your success). There are several other basic principals that I will hopefully cover in the future articles. However, the most important fact to remember is this. The road of success is always under construction. If you understand and follow the basic principals of success, you can avoid the major hurdles and pitfalls of this road. You will also have the ability to build the road on your own terms as you move forward.

Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values

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Learn how to be on Highway to Success. for FREE INFORMATION Visit our site...http://www.abedi.com
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