Leather Spinsters Newsletter February 2003 Edition

Leather Spinsters Newsletter February 2003 Edition

Inside this Newsletter

1. Valentine's Day Again
2. Articles

    A. Good-bye to Stone Cold Habits
    B. Magnetize your Mind
3. For Your Information

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Valentine's Day Again

Whelp it's Valentine's Day again. It seems that each year I make an effort to write something to try to change the perceptions of single women about this so-called "day for lovers".

My approach this year is different. Instead of encouraging unattached females to make this a self enjoyment day I'm urging them to treat it like any other day, do what they would normally do on this particular day of the week.


For some women they have deepseated issues regarding being single and to them Valentine's Day exacerbates those feelings. So, until those issues are cleared away Valentine's Day will always represent a day of not fitting in. It's my desire to encourage women to continue (or start) working on their inner selves so as to design their lives according to their terms, discovering the joy all us us want and need.

As with previous months, February's newsletter will have articles on enhancing the single woman's life from the inside to be reflected outwardly. Sincerely,
Regena English

Good-bye to Stone Cold Habits


J. Martin Kohe retells a story in his book _Your Greatest Power_.

When the library of Alexandria burned down, all the books but one were destroyed. The single remaining book did not look like it had much value. A poor man was able to buy it for a very small amount of money. In the book, he found written the secret of the Touchstone.

This small Touchstone pebble was able to change any common metal into pure gold. The book explained that the pebble was on the shores of the Black Sea along with many thousands of identical pebbles. The Touchstone was different from all the other pebbles in only one way.

The Touchstone was warm while all the others were cold.

The man sold his meager possessions, bought some provisions, and headed for the Black Sea. When he got there, he began to feel each of the pebbles. So he would not have to feel the same pebble twice, he tossed each cold one into the sea.


For three years, he did this. Pick up a pebble, feel that it is cold, and throw it out into the sea. Over and over and over.

One day, he picked up a pebble and it was warm. The man threw it into the sea! He had developed a deeply ingrained habit of tossing pebbles.

Even when the Touchstone pebble he so desired came into his grasp, he threw it away.

What unrecognized gems have you thrown away out of habit?


Today examine your pebbles using your grand gift of choosing rather than your habit of discarding, dismissing, discounting.

Are there people in your life to whom you only half listen out of habit? Objects in your environment you only half see? Textures you only half feel? Songs you only half hear? Foods you only half taste? Thoughts you only half think?

Messages from your heart and soul you toss away? Strong creative urges you drown? Gifts you bury with the old shovel of habit?

Daily many of us are throwing away resources and riches. Over and over and over.

Today, use each of your senses in a fresh way, free of the habit lockstep. Listen, hear, feel, touch, see, watch, move, taste, smell ANEW.

When a pebble on the shore of your day comes into your awareness, look at it with new and fresh eyes. Respect it, re-spect it, look again.

Then choose what you want to do with it. Do you choose to throw it out to sea, away from your awareness? That's fine, of course. But your choosing ensures that you will toss away no gems. Some pebbles you may choose to keep.

Gatherings and rituals of family and friends can become habits. So can business functions. Same menu or agenda, same people, same activities, same old, same old. Lots of cold and worn pebbles to toss away. Know that there also are some very warm Touchstones waiting for you. Choose to hold all in your awareness today so you won't miss the warmth.

Once you savor the warmth, it can thaw and melt frozen habits and hearts. For each of us, today can be the birth of a new way.

ęCopyright 2002 Stephanie West Allen

Stephanie West Allen, JD, brings humor and motivation to associations and organizations. http://www.allen-nichols.com.

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Magnetize your Mind

From the book "Contemporary Parables"
by Robert Elias Najemy

There is an interesting phenomenon in the physics of a magnet and its effect on a piece of iron. In order to understand this phenomenon, we must first realize that a magnet is simply a piece of ordinary iron with one simple difference: the iron molecules are all aligned with their poles oriented in the same direction. This unified alignment and polarity allows them to create a magnetic field, which gives them a power which simple pieces of iron do not have, since their molecules are neither aligned in the same direction nor are all their poles similarly oriented.

However, every time a simple piece of iron comes into contact with a magnet it is slightly changed. Being subjected to that magnetic force, cause a few iron molecules to realign themselves with the same polarity in the same direction. That simple piece of iron after each contact with a magnet becomes a little more of a magnet. If we allow it to remain in contact with a magnet for many hours, or bring it into contact with the magnet many times for shorter periods of time, the iron will permanently become a magnet.

The same is true concerning the relationship between the mind - personality and the soul. The soul is like the magnet. It has special qualities of peace, love, spiritual clarity, unconditional love, inner strength, inspiration and fulfillment. When the mind or personality come into contact with the soul, or inner self, while in meditation or prayer, they temporarily obtain these qualities. But when one ceases to meditate or pray, the mind begins to function again based on old programmings.

It may seem that we have done nothing or that we have no benefit. The truth is that the mind has been changed, to some small degree, by each contact with our inner peace, with our soul. The mind is gradually oriented in a more spiritual direction, gaining clarity and becoming more powerful. Each meditation or prayer session leaves us more reoriented and our mind a little more powerful.

Just as we can magnetize a piece of iron,
we can spiritualize our mind.

Robert Elias Najemy, a life coach with 30 years of experience, has created a L i f e C o a c h T r a i n i n g Course over the Internet. Info at: http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/introholisticcoach.asp He is the author of over 20 books, 600 articles and 400 lecture cassettes on Human Harmony. His book The Psychology of Happiness is available athttp://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0971011605/holisticharmo-20 and Download FREE 100's of articles, find w o n d e r f u l e b o o k s and get g u i d a n c e at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com

For Your Information
No profits are gained nor claims are made by publishing this potentially helpful information.


Dear Webmaster,
I am a doctoral student in the Department of Psychology at Indiana University, Bloomington. I am currently collecting responses for a study on sexual desire and asexuality, along with my supervisor, Professor Cynthia Graham. Would you be willing to help our current research effort by providing this link to our questionnaires on your website? https://www.indiana.edu/~study/introduction.html

Although that web page will give you some sense of our goals, I would like to tell you about them directly. We hope to accomplish two things with these questionnaires. The first goal is to better characterize what it means to be asexual. For instance, asexuals may define what it means to be sexual differently from non-asexuals. Very little research has been done on this topic, so this project has the potential to increase discussion about what an asexual identity means. The second goal is simply to better understand what might be a reasonable distinction between the terms .sexual arousal. and .sexual desire.. While the answer may seem clear at first, this is currently a hotly debated topic in sexuality research.

Our questionnaires are presented on a secure server and do not require participants to identify themselves. In return for participating, respondents may enjoy viewing the survey results, which we update, and have the opportunity to enter a drawing for 3 $50 cash awards if they wish.

If you have any questions, I would be happy to call you at your preferred time, or feel free to contact me by phone (812-856-9065) or email (study@indiana.edu). We also have some information about our study on the web site of the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction, which partially sponsors this project (http://www.indiana.edu/~kinsey/research/desire_orient.html). Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you.
Nicole Merritt, BA
Clinical Science
Department of Psychology
Indiana University
1101 E Tenth Street
Bloomington, IN 47405-7007
812.856.9065 or 855.7686

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