Leather Spinsters Newsletter June 2003 Edition

Leather Spinsters Newsletter June 2003 Edition

Inside this Newsletter

1. Articles

    A. Boycotting Women
    B. Think Like a Child
3. For Your Information

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Boycotting Women

The beauty of being a woman today is being able to think for self. Unfortunately, some women are threatened by this right of being and make a point to discourage other women from exercising this personal freedom.

Recently I received an email asking for my support to ban a certain XXX actress from performing in Houston because (the emailer's reasoning not mine) this woman and women like her were convoluting the message, "women can work any job" and for encouraging sex crimes by permitting themselves to be seen as sex objects. As to the first argument of the emailer, isn't this what women have been demanding all along, to be able to work where they have a interest and ability?

I scatched my head in astonishment to the comments expressed by this woman thinking she can make life decisions for other women so as to prevent them from making choices she don't approve.

I call it hypocrisy because women have been saying for a long time (a century and a half to be exact) they are capable of working in any field of employment. However when they do and it don't fit into some guideline of what others believe are acceptable professions a annoying hissing begins.

Personally I wouldn't want to earn my living undressing on or off camera, but that's how I feel. I'm not yeaing or naying "adult" professions, they are legal and women have the right to choose them without harrassment from other women if they so desire.

The statement strippers and XXX actresses are the reason pedophilia and rapes occur is pardoning the predators. Besides, blaming these women for crimes that have their orgins in antiquity, a time before Gentleman's clubs and peep shows, is highly unfair . We can't allow misguided beings who viciously violate others to evade being held accountable for their actions just so we can badger women holding undesirable jobs.

The emailer stated that we, meaning the community at large, must boycott this adult performer and others like her to save future generations of women from being exposed to their destructive messages. Funny, this same woman didn't seem to recognize those same destructive messages were being promoted each hour of the day on the radio, television, and yes even within mainstream movies. I didn't hear this woman pledging to boycott Basic Instinct (Sharon Stone) or Monster's Ball (Halle Berry), when they rolled into local movie theaters. Do you wonder why?

I'll tell you why. Quite possibly this woman may have it in her mind if the nudity and explicit sex acts are sanctioned by MGM or Sony Pictures the end product would be acceptable, which could be another hypocrisy point. If she wanted to be consistent with her argument why didn't she seek to ban all tv shows,movies and videos that expose young women to wanton sex acts and misleading messages? She didn't because it would have been seen as ludicrous by the masses.

Inspite of any criticism I may have of her intentions I know deep down she means well but there are holes in her logic. If the argument for boycotting is, "this stripper (and women like her) allow themselves to be seen as sex objects", then I ask what's the difference between Halle being nude and sexually provocative for Sony Pictures and Ginger stripping for Pimps Gentleman's Club on the shady side of town? Personally, I didn't see a difference between the two examples. Young women today are overwhelmed with sexual messages and hardly any daily dosages of positive images of womanhood (women who are emotionally and spiritually strong).

    Do we really have the power to keep someone from lusting after another (seeing them as a sex object)? The answer is no!

My suggestions to this woman were, make a difference with the next generation of women by living as a example, permitting younger women to see her confidence. Secondly, make a point to explain to those young females how important it is to respect their bodies but not be summed up by them, after all they have more to offer this world than just external beauty. Thirdly, allow other women the right to make their on roads through life, doesn't matter if they are are morally unsound or not, allow women to choose for themselves.

In a nutshell, boycotting women for taking advanatage of their God-given right, to think for themselves is not the answer. Again, it doesn't matter if their choices appear to be poor ones, the mere fact they have the ability and right to think for themselves should be respected. Motivating women to acknowledge and cherish every aspect of who they are, emotionally, spiritually, and yes physically will leave a wonderfully undeniable legacy for the next generation of women.

Regena English,editor webmaster@leatherspinsters.com

"Reality of your physical state is an illusion you can accept or not"
David Cameron Gikandi, A Pocket Full of Money (ebook)

Think Like a Child

    Chasing rainbows til the darkness comes
    Chase the lightening bugs til dawn
    Climbing up a tree so tall
    Jumping, leaping, catching frogs

    Jump right in the water deep
    Fearing not, I'll take the leap
    Then one day I grew up
    And listened to a stirring voice

    What happened to that child in me
    The one that said things as they came
    I didn't know that I could not fly
    Until another told me why
    By Mysti~

When I was a child, I was sure I could fly. I would have the most wonderful daydreams of flying. I talked to imaginary friends and believed that fairies and rabbits talked with one another in the woods.

One day I remember an adult in my life telling me that was wrong, it was nonsense. For so many years they had told me of the Easter bunny and a jolly man in a suit that brings presents, the tooth fairy and the life of Jesus. They wanted me to stop believing in fairy tales, big rabbits delivering eggs, wishes coming true and my imaginary friends, but I had to go to church and believe in something I did not see nor understand.

A man that had done wonderful things, miracles, changing water into wine and raising people from the dead, son of God, which was told from a Holy Book, but I was not allowed to believe I could talk to the woodland creatures or my invisable friends?

As a child, this made no sense to me because when I was in the woods, I could see the rabbits and the birds and feel the peace, but I could not see God or his Son.

This was something that baffled me and kept me always looking in those fairytale books stashed away in the quiet room, and I would go there and dream of the possibilities of magic.

As I grew up and was continually told that there was only one belief and one choice, I began to look around and question. I do not believe in just one belief, nor do I judge others for their choices.

For many of us, when we're children we have the faith of a mountain but then things change. The adults that were ahead of us were programmed by the adults ahead of them, that when you grow up, believing in mysteries and magic has to come to an end.

I continued to go through my life searching for a meaning to all of these mixed messages until I finally decided that none of the norm was for me.

I took a stand and began to reacquaint myself with my inner child. I went deep into my soul and there in a corner she sat, with tears streaming down her face, afraid to be herself. Afraid that someone would say she was wrong or that everything she felt or believed was just not right. She never had, had her own thoughts and ideas, was never given the chance.

Now was her chance.

I awakened or was reborn. I never had felt things like this before. My senses were alive. I hungered to know more of where I really came from and what I was here to do in this life and many before this.

I began to find that many paths lead to the same Oneness or Higher Power. That everyone has the right to choose how they believe, what they believe, when and where. I felt free.

I once again felt that I could fly.

I found that life moves in a circle and that my parents taught what they had been taught. I am so glad I allowed my children to be themselves.

What we so importantly need to do is not teach our children to believe in just what they see, but to believe in what they feel from their hearts.

Know and understand that by all means, I am not saying that what my parents taught me about Jesus was wrong. I have my own conclusions and understandings of it all, so do not anger your self. I just have a very open mind and heart and believe that Jesus would definitely enjoy talking to the animals and telling children wonderful stories of faith and magic... and yes he would love it if we all began once again... to think like a child.

Fran Hafey is a Spiritual Counselor, Teacher, Writer and Healer. She provides guidance and inspiration via her Website, groups and newsletter through the Internet and other Resources. To read more of her articles visit the Author's Website: http://Mystickblue.com or http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SpiritualPathways/join She's currently working on publishing her own books about love, inspiration, peace, magic and nature stories for Children of all ages.


    Another Man Shortage?

Hi Regina,
Here, here! Well said, as usual. You know I am "living proof" of this. I live in the middle of nowhere: seriously rural and inaccessible, I hardly ever leave the house. I'm 46, somewhat overweight, don't dress up (well, would YOU to walk the dog around potato fields?)

... and yet I STILL get invitations that I am perfectly happy to turn down. :-)

Madame English,
Oh how I agree. Women waste so much time chasing down men and so little time actually being happy in the "now". It is a wonder many women actually find men period not to mention good ones by being desperate. Keep up the good work! Leslie

Well it stands to reason women are crying about a lack of men because they truly believe they are lesser beings without them. Joie was right in saying when a woman is desperate she will have a man shortage, isnt the Universe giving them what they expect, a shortage.Rachel

Regena I agree oh I agree. The moment I changed my attitude about being single I've been a guy magnet, no playboys here, they are respectful,hardworking, and family-oriented men. Too bad I lack the drive to settle down. 41,Shel

The only purpose this man shortage serves is to justify men having more than one woman and it being ok with the women involved. Ladies need to wake up and see desperation has never served them well and will continue to bring them more of the same. There's nothing wrong with being happy without running down the bulls (men).Dorian

Normally I do not comment on the articles I read in this newsletter but A Man Shortage got a nod from me. I am a man aged 37 and single (by choice). Regena you are correct in your assumption no man wants a woman that is needy for them. Ask any guy if he would get involved with a desperate woman he would say no, unless he is interested in taking advantage of her weak state. With this latest rash of insane women running over husbands and boyfriends with their cars I would not advise any guy to take advantage of desperate women.Ken

* In Britain until fairly recently there was a steady drip of articles about a shortage of marriagable men, it's not a subject I take a lot of interest in, because, as you say, it all purest baloney, but I think I have recently seen articles about shortage of marriagable WOMEN.

The interesting question is, "what is the MOTIVE of these writers?" What ACTION are they proposing? Flying in hunky Russians? Why not write to these authors and ask them? You might get some (unintentionally) revealing answers!

You are dead right about desperation driving men away. It is a disaster to marry the wrong person, so men are wary. No man of sense wants to marry a woman who he thinks wants him just because he is a man, he wants a woman who he judges likes him for himself.

* I used to think that your interest in water was a bit eccentric, but I realise now that I have something of interest to say.

In Britain it used to be said that women had a greater tendency to go dry because it was more inconvenient for them to go to the toilet, but the spread of public toilets has taken reason that away. ALL are now urged to drink more water, and this in a country with much lower evaporation than America.

Professional women now tend to carry "water bottles", plastic bottles of about 1 pint capacity, with a sliding collar/nozzle which allows them to take a little sip,and the re-seal it without it leaking. Despite the jokes, they really do contain water, not gin. They are really more a fashion statement or declaration that you take your health seriously than anything else. Asking about them in my circles, I found that some (mostly men) were completely unaware of water bottles, but professional women saw them everywhere even if they didn't have one themselves.

Michael Bell

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