Leather Spinsters Newsletter November 2002 Edition

Leather Spinsters Newsletter November 2002 Edition


Inside this Newsletter

1. Newsletter Agenda
2. Articles

    A. Limitations & Risk Taking
    B. Three GREAT Holiday Gift Ideas
3. Spinster Letters

Newsletter Agenda

The articles featured in this newsletter are done so as tools inwhich you can apply in your own life, to purposefully create the life you desire. Yes you may find occasional articles exploring the lifestyles of other single women, but the main purpose is to supply you the reader with as many methods of pursuing your life goals as possible. All too often we live by "accident", experiencing a mixed bag of unconscious intentions with halfhearted wishes for something better. Now you can exercise a choice in the kind of life you want. See and use this publication for all the good it can offer you to change your life in major and satisfying ways. Let go of the notion you can't "have it all", whatever "having it all" may mean to you, on the basis you're single, female, and over the age of 30.


Limitations & Risk Taking

I want to share two stories with you, one deals with limitations and the other addresses risk taking, two aspects of living most people have the hardest time understanding. First off limitations.

My sister was six years old when she was diagnosed with curviture of the spine due to a tumor growth. The solution to my sister' s problem was the removal of the tumorous growth and the infusion of a metal rod to her spine. Here we are thirty years later and she has had no problems with her spine since having surgery as a child.

All her life she was told don't do this don't do that for fear she would injury her spine. It wasn't until she became an adult she was free to do those things that interested her. Recently she had been inline skating with my niece and loving it, no cares about spinal injuries, just appreciating each moment of fun with her daughter.

My mother was appalled when she heard my sister was skating,"oh she could injure herself, she could cause that rod in her back to move, she could paralyze herself, etc,etc." What my mother failed to comprehend was, my sister's limitations in life are up to what she holds in her mind as true. If she didn't lend credence to her spine being fragile why should I or anyone else tell her otherwise.

As an adult my sister don't see limitations to what she can do and succeed doing. Question. Do you place limitations on your life, conversing within your mind how you can't achieve something? Are you one of those people who could find twenty reasons as to why you can't do something and only one reason as to why you can? Do you permit past mistakes or circumstances to influence what you will or won't do today?

Now on to risk taking. A week ago I was told a story by a local motorcycle racer how a co-worker continually forecasted his demise. Every Monday Jeff's co-worker Leon would make a statement,"oh so you lived past another weekend at the race track, congratulations. Hell I would love to try it but that's just too dangerous and I like living, unlike you."

Leon made this statement every week until finally Jeff responded with, "life is too short to live fearful of what ifs. Rolling out of bed is a risk, no more no less of a risk than me racing my motorcycle at the track every weekend".

Leon bar humbugged Jeff's retort by saying motorcycle racing is too dangerous no matter how much fun and you're asking to die. Leon was known by his boss and co-workers to be prompt and always present at work, except he failed to show up for his shift two days in a row.

Concerned for Leon his employer phoned his mother to ascertain Leon's whereabouts. Surprised by her son's absentism she asked the employer to accompany her to her son's apartment. They found Leon dead in his bathtub, he had slipped and hit his head on the back of the tub.

Questions: Do you go through life denying yourself experiences out fear? Do you think living means doing so free of risk taking?

Both limitations and risk taking are based on FEAR. Although FEAR often stand in the way of us being our best, being happy, and understanding our greater good it has its reasons for being. FEAR's purpose is to protect. Although it's classified as an emotion it can be seen as a instinctual response to the environment inwhich we live.

Unfortunately, over the millenia this emotion or instinctual response has been permitted to transcend it's original purpose and dominate our decisionmaking. If we're to ever live in and for the moment we must learn to reduce the power of fear back to its original purpose, for it's in controlling this emotion we truly learn to live and appreciate all life has to offer us.

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Regena English is the editor of both The Leather Spinsters Newsletter and Leather Spinsters on the Web Ezine located at http://www.leatherspinsters.com/ezine.html


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Three GREAT Holiday Gift Ideas

It's not too early to start thinking of the holidays. They will be here before you know it and if you don't plan ahead, you could find yourself overspending, stressed out and even getting into debt. So read on, and consider one of the following three options for those on your holiday list this year:

1. Consider giving a service gift. Most of us have more junk and more stuff than we need. Our closets are stuffed full. We need to build on to our homes to make room for our things. The cars have to be parked outside, as the garage is too full. The last thing most of us really need is "more stuff." Maybe, just maybe, the people you are giving gifts to might be in the same boat. Here are some service gift ideas: Certificate to a hair salon for a manicure, pedicure or haircut. Certificate to a day spa, facial, or massage. Who wouldn't like something like that? Additional options are certificates to a restaurant, car wash, yard or housekeeping service. The list could go on and on. These types of gifts show a little more thought than just giving cash. Best of all, you won't be contributing to anyone's clutter.

2. The next idea is for those hard to please people on your list who like "stuff". Consider giving them a Gift Certificate to their favorite shopping store. Not only will they be able to get MORE for their money because of all the post holiday sales, but they will be able to the exact color, size or model that appeals to them. This has multiple benefits as it can relieve much of your stress, the recipient can get exactly what they like and your gift will go further with all the great coupons and discounts that seem to come later.

3. Lastly, try giving theme gifts that you design. If you have a golf lover in the family, make a cute basket with golf accessories, a subscription to a golf magazine and some homemade cookies decorated as golf balls. Or how about a basket to take care of one's automobile such as cleaners, car wash coupons, car cookies or whatever else you can come up with. The ideas are unlimited and can include any amount of items to fit your budget.

I do hope these ideas have given you something new to try for the holidays and for your gift giving dilemmas. Be sure and take time to enjoy your families, spend time with loved ones, and remember the important things in life.

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Doris Dobkins is a money saving expert, author and speaker and has helped thousands of people find ways to save money and get out of debt.

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Spinster Letters

    You Can't Get There From Here

    Wow. Yes I totally agree with you. Words and feelings are powerful creators the very reason we should monitor them daily. That article was powerful!Trisha

    Janine Just wrote a very thought filled article. I never thought about how much the media color our thoughts and impressions until reading this article. I can not account for how many times I walked for breast cancer thinking I was making a difference. Unbeknownst to me I was apart of the problem.unnamed

    Misses Just and English,
    I read the article with a great deal of interest because I know it to be sound in truth. But lets be realistic, Miss English some of the articles you've written in the past basically described people as fearful of thinking for self and fearful of change so how effective will this article be in reaching the average jane doe, those people who happen to represent the masses way of thinking, those people afraid of change and thinking for themselves?

    Miss Just you're correct when you say most people are ignorant not evil, so I'll go a step further, they're evil because they refuse to do better, they refuse to raise themselves emotionally and spiritually, therefore their reluctance to be divine humans causes them to wallow in the gutter standing for nothing that requires independent thought, this is what makes them evil. Refusing to think for self makes them vulnerable to the lies of those who are trully evil, so what I'm saying is they are evil by proxy.

    Now the mindset of the masses is so certain topics are offlimits because they are considered primitive and nonesense. Miss Just you wrote a lengthy article that argues known facts about human programming but at the end you ramble on about dousing and kinesiology, you just gave your serious article the curse of disregard. Here again I know dousing to be a real art inwhich scientists are still trying to explain but the average person who is stuck on stupid will see it as a goofy new age craft. You should have left that bit of info out of your article because these people inwhich you want to communicate had tuned you out when they saw the words dousing and kinesiology.Valerie

    You can't get there was overwhelming. Reading how the advertising of large corporations is creating realities in our minds to suit their needs is frightening.Beatris

    I discovered what Miss Just wrote in high school while working on a paper on the health of pioneers. Those people did not suffer a eighth as many diseases and health crisis we contend with in this sophisticated world because they did not have mass communications, or the vision to make billions off the hides of people. I have wondered how many people would be alive today had they not bought into the medical scares thanks to greedy corporations and slick pr people?Destiny

    Losing a breast to cancer at the age of 25 is the fault of public relations people, gee Janine who do I sue? Because I walked in a walkathon for breast cancer I created breast cancer for myself, again Janine who do I sue?Should I expect alzheimer and juvenile diabetes too because I raised money for them too?Rhonda Anne

    My mother always said when I was growing up,illness is a state of mind so stand with a broom at the entrance to prevent dirt from getting in. Today she is a spry 93 year old no one can guess age. She don't watch tv and seldom listen to the radio her way of keeping the dirt (deceit) out of her mind.Bethany

      Commonsense Approach to Domestic Violence


    Regena,
    I can't believe here we are two years into the millenium and women are still fighting the same battles. When will women stop the violence against them once and for all? Reading how women are still permitting partners to abuse them is crazy. This violence will not stop until women actually work on themselves to stop attracting those types of people. Rudy

    I didn't read the article but I did read reactions to it in the last edition. If violence in the home is to stop women must not fight others who offer them safe passages out of their situations. Safe passages out are loving yourself, seeing your mistakes, and forgiving yourself for making them but someone has to show these women the safe passage. Housing them in our homes, and moving them around like the underground railroad is not going to deter the violence from happening again. Out of all the responses you received only two were angry over your opinion to nurture the self esteem to prevent future occurrences of domestic violence. All they did was solidify your very thoughts, self esteem is the prevention needed to prevent young girls and women from becoming someone's doormat. Women who feel good about themselves don't attract violent brutes. Deede

    One of the commenters last month said women in this country are encouraged to always defer to the man, personally that has never been my experience so I wouldn't know about that. If either of those women angered by the article received this newsletter each month they would see the cycle of deferring to anyone but self is up to them. How pitiful these women couldn't see the cause of their misfortune with their mates, they refuse to acknowledge we all ok on some level everything we experience in life, everything!Jessica

    What issue did the domestic violence article appear? Frankly speaking, few victims of domestic violence like it when someone point out they indirectly had a hand in their mistreatment. Could this be why women were angry, they saw the logic in what you were saying but didn't like the idea of you saying it?Lisa

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