Leather Spinsters Newsletter November 2004 Edition

Leather Spinsters Newsletter November 2004 Edition

Inside this Newsletter

1. Articles

    A. A Lesson in Letting Go

    B. Reversal of Fortune

2. FYI (For Your Information)

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A Lesson in Letting Go

Do you hear yourself saying?

When I have enough money, I'll...
When I go on vacation, I'll...
As soon as I find the right partner, I'll...
When the house is clean, I'll be able to...
When I can afford a better car, I'll...
When this project is over, I'll...
As soon as I get more clients, I'll...
I can't leave work, or I'll...
When my kids are grown and moved out,I"ll...

How much of your life do you put on hold?

During coaching sessions, people share their "I'll's" with me all the time. The most popular justifications are that they are waiting waiting for the money or the time to magically open up.

Tracking the reasons over a ten year period and finding the bottom line truth, people aren't hungry enough to do what it takes to find or create the money.

I'm sure you have accomplished many things in your life without money. Thus, why would you believe that these I'll can't be on that list as well?

There are five elements involved with achieving prosperity. Money only one of them. Energy (sometimes mislabelled as power), love, time and success are the other four.

Belief underlies this whole process. The belief that you need money to accomplish whatever is on your list. The belief that there are no other options. And so many more. What are your beliefs that are placing your "I'll's" on your hold list?

And excellent question. However, until you are aware of what's on the list, and they are a true want, you don't open up your vision to their possibilities.

The biggest time I was aware of this in my life was some years back when my father was very ill. He said to me, "Go after your dream, don't wait for anything." I'm sure you've heard that as well somewhere in your life.

Discussing that further with him, I realized that I didn't know what I wanted. So I thought. I soon realized that that wasn't it at all. I just didn't believe it was possible to "really" live the way I wanted. Since then, I travelled for a year all over the world, attending and teaching at conferences, attending universities, and even personally studying with well-known writers.

And how it all came about was still an awesome miracle to me. Most of the adventure paid for by someone else, or an organization. But I had to take risks, at least they were big risks to me. Sometimes I didn't know how I was going to get there or back, where I was going to sleep, or what to do in between destinations. In every situation, every instance, things appeared that still leave me spell bound.

And it all began with a little trust and belief. Since this time other amazing adventures appeared, including studying with some of the most amazing people in the world.

Can this happen for you? You bet it can. Dr. Wayne Dyer, Donald Walsh, and Deepak Chopra, three I now call friends, tell you all about it in their books and lectures as well.

What underlies all this? One thing -- our belief system. If you believe you must have money in order to do something, then you will need to. You closed the window to possibilities. If you need all the answers before you start, you will get exactly that, waiting on all the answers to appear.

Have you given up on one of your "I'lls"?

As children, we don't understand adult situations. We hear this and that and when there are gaps, we toss in whatever is available from our warehouse of experiences. We usually carry this learning experience until we seniors. And there is an awakening when we realize there are less years ahead than behind. A new wisdom emerges.


1. Ask new questions when these beliefs saboteur your success. This is examining that belief. When this occurs, it is important to ask these valuable questions:

(1) What is the belief? You need to name it to claim it. Many times, we don't want to own that belief -- we avoid the ownership. This denial dances around until we can no longer stay behind the way. Until it gets bad enough... we're broke, eating our loneliness away, and other destructive habits. Learn to name it, this automatically starts the change, then take it one step at a time from that point. Don't look jump the ocean. Stick your toe in the water. It's cold water and you need to get used to it a little at a time. Give it daily conscious thought. Just by doing this alone, you build the boat that will cross the ocean.

(2) Does the belief serve me any longer? Did the belief serve you when you were a teenager, and now you are 55? Adjust it for the age.

(3) Who says the belief needs to be this way? What gives them the right to say this? Are they just transferring their own belief to you? Don't be willing to accept it. Form your own. Give it some space.

(4) Who will be upset if you change this belief? The fear of losing someone, confronting someone on their beliefs is nerve wracking to most people. Do you really need to confront them on it? No. Do you need to tell them they are wrong? No. Do you need to let it go and form your own? Yes.

Take more leaps of faith!

Change your beliefs, every single one that isn't current serving you. Stop, I'll'ing...or when'ing.

It takes space to open up and invite abundance and prosperity into your life. If you life is too full with excuses, what ifs, or someday you'll, there isn't any room.

Invest in yourself today and every day of your life, not just your money.

Invest in your own energy, your personal power, your love for yourself and others, your time, and your success.

The payoff is the biggest in the world...happiness... living your life now and not later.

Be brave, not much, just a little. Take a leap of faith purposely every day for the next week. When it works, continue the process. One toe at a time.

Create the new space needed to invite abundance in. Go ahead, go in. The waters fine. Stop waiting for the eclipse marks to stop. They stop when you take the leap!


Catherine Franz, a Business Coach, specialized in writing, marketing and product development. Newsletters and additional articles:http://www.abundancecenter.com Get blog:http://abundance.blogs.com.

Reversal of Fortune

I used to consider that all of the talk and opinions of life, love, and happiness were nothing more than words spewed forth by those who were running away from their own lives. But, as in all things, we wake up one day and realize that the information we've ingested actually holds some weight within our own lives.

--- Rubbed the Wrong Way ---

It's interesting how some opinions or views actually rub us in awkward ways. It's as if the other party, presenting the view, is purposefully locating and hitting buttons to make us wriggle in our seats. We hear such opinions and comments and find that they stick with us for an extended time. No matter how hard we try to forget, these ideas and feelings are somewhere in our minds. Realize that, the only time that such views are found to be oppressive, inflammatory, or even slightly irritating is when we already know such views to be true yet we don't want to accept them. We have ideas in our minds on how things should be and we choose which ones suit our path. However, some of these ideas are pushed to the back because they don't necessarily suit what we think is right or are not in line with our path. It is those hidden ideas that are the buttons and fears that are there to be pushed.

--- Bury the Hatchet ... and Everything Else ---

We all have an established "comfort zone" that allows us to function along the paths that we've chosen. Each path is unique and uses a library of resources that we've collected and adapted into our belief systems to reach our life objectives. These belief systems provide us with the unique views and methods of movement that we have about our lives, the world, and our friends and family. It is interesting that, in our comfort zones, we spend so much time trying to hide external realizations from ourselves that we never have the time to truly take a look. We busily bury new information and ideas because they don't fit within and threaten our current domain of existence. However, if we're busily burying these ideas and bits of information and we feel uncomfortable by the mention of these ideas from others, how comfortable is this zone anyway?

--- I Choose ... Door Number 1 ---

Many people feel that they don't have a choice in their life, love, career, and happiness. Some feel that they just never make the right choices. But, believing that one has no choice is a choice in itself. A decision was made to stay in a particular situation or to live with a given event because it was safe and comfortable. Although it might not be comfortable to the spiritual being trying to get out, it is to the physical and emotional being looking for consistency. It took years, and a catastrophic motorcycle accident, to allow me to integrate my long buried views into my life. I realized that, indeed, I had made the choices I did and they were not thrust upon me by the Universe. Those hidden ideas and beliefs, when touched, create an environment for stress and internal conflict. Those tests that we feel are forced on us and the occasional difficult times we have are not issued by the Universe, but are instead devised and implemented by us, upon us, to bring these hidden ideas and beliefs to the surface.

--- What's next? ---

Realize that, although we have our own belief systems, built on years of personal growth, our feelings and beliefs constantly evolve and grow. These hidden ideas and beliefs and this internal evolution causes us to occasionally feel stress with ourselves because the new ideas and beliefs coming to the surface don't fall in line with our existing lives. Occasionally, we must all clean house and alter our lives and beliefs to accommodate our growth. In this way, we can continuously move forward, provide room for future growth, and make our lives easier. Instead of fearing our internal new ideas and feelings, take hold of them and see where they lead. The new direction that evolves is something your brain has been working on, using your belief system, hopes, and desires as a basis, and, indeed, the destination might just be where you wanted to go in the first place! !


Edward B. Toupin, Ph.D., is an author, publisher, life-strategy coach, counselor, Reiki Master, and technical writer living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he provides assistance, books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from career success through life organization and fulfillment. Check out some of his recent print and electronic books as well as his articles covering various life-changing topics! For more information, and to find out about his upcoming books, e-mail Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or visit his site at speaker, consultant and author of numerous books. Visit his site for more information, or to sign up for his FREE newsletter of Life, Love and Laughter at http://www.toupin.com



No profits are gained nor claims are made by publishing this potentially helpful information.

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